Career change? Thought you were comfortable? Picture courtesy of www.tvftdo.com

A client of mine has been working on making changes to her career for a while now. During this time she has managed to alter the conditions of her current job and she has improved relationships and communication with her colleagues. She has a better work/life balance, clearly, she feels better about herself overall.

All the while we have worked I can hear that deep down she really wishes to change direction or change jobs and start something new. I have tried to push and encourage her to make the move yet each time she pushes back or is opting out of a decision.   Also, family circumstances and events have occurred that have diverted her focus. The important thing is she does what is right for her.  She has got to the point now where she is completely fed up with herself for not making a change and is prepared to do something. It’s a kind of tipping point.

In a coaching session last week, she realised that whilst her perception of her current job is she’s staying put because it’s comfortable, she’s actually really very uncomfortable.   Also, that she’s putting a huge amount of effort and energy into making it OK and trying to make it comfortable. In fact she’s putting so much effort into making it comfortable it could be easier to just go for it and find something new.  The comfort zone she believes she has is uncomfortable.

Even when we got to this point she was still talking herself out if it, her mind was rushing ahead; ‘What if this?’, ‘What if that?’ ‘What happens when I get to this stage?’ I reassured her that if she takes a step by step approach, she can deal with these challenges if they happen and this will make the transition easier.

Now I am not going to push her to move into something new until she is ready, the decision has to be hers, however the realisation has hit home.  Last week’s session was a big breakthrough.

Like the picture?  See more at www.theviewfromthedartmouthoffice.com

Sue Bown

Works with businesses and individuals to get better results, more efficiency, less stress AND more success. I play golf too, especially in the sun!

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LK Bennett website

I am loving LK Bennett’s latest advertising campaign with it’s clever strapline ‘Life is the occasion’.  How often do you keep your best clothes, best attitude, or dare I say, best behaviour for special occasions only? 

Life IS the occasion.

Sue Bown

Works with businesses and individuals to get better results, more efficiency, less stress AND more success. I play golf too, especially in the sun!

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I’ve just recieved an email from a client who has come to realise she has bad habits.  There are things that she does regularly every day that bother her, I smiled as I read her email as I realised she’s not alone.  I could recognise a few habits of mine I’d like to change.  There are also habits I’m glad to keep, we need habits or routine to get us through every day.  Get up, get washed, get dressed.  They’re all good habits, they keep us busy and it’s just part of daily life.  They serve us.  It’s the bad habits that need to change.  The ones that don’t serve us.   These could be to exercise regularly, to eat healthily, to make decisions quickly, the list goes on.

Habits are also a useful way to remember and do the things we learn, the new skills we acquire. the more we do them, the more they become part of us.  Think about something that was once completely alien to you and is now part of daily life, for example, driving a car, riding a bike, using a mobile phone.  All of these things once learned became habits, things we could repeat easily and effortlessly. 

Having this ability to repeat habits means that we tend to keep habits that we don’t want, for example; smoking, procrastination, staying in bed too late, over-eating.  The good news here is just as we can learn to do things we can un-learn by doing something else.  We can learn a new good habit to replace and old bad habit.  All we have to do is get started.  So why not write a list of three bad habits you could change today and write down what you’re going to do instead.  Then start behaving ‘as if’ these new habits were already part of daily life.  Keep going with it and soon your new habits will become part of a new you.

Sue Bown

Works with businesses and individuals to get better results, more efficiency, less stress AND more success. I play golf too, especially in the sun!

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Dr Mariette Jansen explains how meditation can help reduce stress

A couple of weeks ago I attended a meditation workshop run by stress management consultant, Dr Mariette Jansen.  It was a very profound yet practical experience where I and I experienced very deep relaxation and calmness.  Mariette runs approximately two of these excellent workshops every month.  I would urge anyone who is experiencing stress or anxiety to attend a workshop.  They are held in Weybridge, Surrey and you will find the schedule for the upcoming events here :

I have recently interviewed Mariette and in the interview she shares some tips on what is meditation and how anyone can incorporate mediation into their life.

Have a listen, I think you’ll agree that Mariette with her beautiful Dutch accent has the most relaxing voice ever.

Mariette is an active blogger writing informative articles on managing stress, have a read of her blog

Sue Bown

Works with businesses and individuals to get better results, more efficiency, less stress AND more success. I play golf too, especially in the sun!

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Find a way to live your life stress-free. Photo courtesy of tvftdo.com

It makes shocking reading but the report by Chartered Institute of Personal Development (CIPD) featured in many of the nationals today says exactly that.  Stress is so common-place it’s the top cause of workplace sickness and it’s so widespread it’s been called the Black Death of the 21st century.

Stress has overtaken stroke, heart attack, cancer and back problems as the commonest cause of absence from work.

Common causes of stress are an excessive workload, the boss’ management style, problems at home, anxiety regarding restructuring in the workplace.

What is stress?
Symptoms of stress are lack of focus, losing your temper more quickly than normal, losing your sense of humour.  Left untreated these can lead to more serious illnesses such as heart disease, stomach and bowel conditions and depression.

I believe that by living in a fast-paced world of fast answers, instant access, iPhones, Blackberrys and social media, whilst they all offer benefits to our lives, they can if misused by detrimental to our health.

My top tips for de-stressing:

1.  Give yourself time everyday.  Find some time even if it’s just 5 minutes where you can just be alone with your thoughts.  We all need thinking time

2.  Focus on your breathing, inhale fully, and exhale fully, using every part of your lungs.

3. Turn off social media, give yourself a break.

4. Take up meditation or yoga.  Both of these are so very beneficial to health and wellbeing.

5. Be your own best friend.  Think about some advice you’d give to a friend in the same situation and take that advice yourself.  You’ll be surprised what you know.

6. Sign up for my free email coaching programme, top left of this page.

Sue Bown

Works with businesses and individuals to get better results, more efficiency, less stress AND more success. I play golf too, especially in the sun!

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As someone who, as a child, used to write bigger to make it look like I’d written more.  I’ve never been much of a writer.  I wonder if I’ve ever really fully discovered my writing  and creativity potential.   Right now, I feel like I’ve learnt more in the past two years than I’d done in the previous twenty.  So what next.  What else can I do?   Who knows.  I’ve loving what I’m doing and I eagerly anticipating my next move.  If you need encouragement about what or where your true potential lies get inspired with this talk by Elizabeth Gilbert, author of the book Eat Pray Love.

Sue Bown

Works with businesses and individuals to get better results, more efficiency, less stress AND more success. I play golf too, especially in the sun!

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Click on image to hear this thought provoking poem

If any of you were listening to Chris Evans’ breakfast show this morning on BBC Radio 2 and heard him talking about the poem ‘The Dash’ by Linda Evans.  It’s very thought provoking, here’s a link to a full version posted on You Tube.

http://youtu.be/zsY6UrFIsNs

I see the author Linda Ellis has a book out called ‘Live Your Dash’, may have to investigate.  When I do I’ll let you know my thoughts.

Live a happy life!

Sue Bown

Works with businesses and individuals to get better results, more efficiency, less stress AND more success. I play golf too, especially in the sun!

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Roses, still looking good

You’ve set your goal, it’s clear, you’re focused, it feels great, all is going well.  Then – you hit a setback, something gets in your way and that’s it – you give up and the dream is gone.  Does this sound familiar?

You’re losing weight and you have a crisis and BANG you go back to your old patterns.  You’ve given up smoking and something stressful happens and you head for the nearest tobacconist.  You are focused on a business goal to make 20 sales calls a week and someone says something negative to you and that’s it – all the good intention – gone!  Old, bad, frustrating patterns return, all the good work undone.  Why does that happen?

A friend came to see me last weekend and bought me 12 beautiful yellow roses, they are so spectacular.  I’m convinced their fragrance has a hint of lemon, just gorgeous.  Today, much to my dismay I noticed that one of the roses had drooped and it wasn’t looking very healthy.  So I quickly removed it from the vase and instantly renewed the display to its former splendour.  Did I have to throw all of them away NO!

So, why, when you have a setback do you throw your whole goal away?  Just find a strategy to get back on track, limit the damage and get focused again.

How to get back on track when you lose focus:

1. Read your goal again (assuming it’s written, if not write it down)
2. Imagine yourself when you’ve achieved your goal.
3. Make a list of what you’ve achieved so far.
4. Write down 3 steps you can do that day to get back on track.
5. Do the first step immediately!

Sue Bown

Works with businesses and individuals to get better results, more efficiency, less stress AND more success. I play golf too, especially in the sun!

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